I’m sure there may have been times in your life where someone disliked you, and you weren’t sure why. You may have come to the conclusion that it’s different strokes for different folks. That not everyone is going to like you. But this may be happening to you more than it ought to. Or, it could not be that people don’t dislike you, but they’re very indifferent towards you. Well, I have some news for you, you can change this. You can get a lot more people to like you by following this one simple rule.
The rule is: If you want people to like you, you have to make them feel good, and if you make them feel bad, they will dislike you. Now, after hearing it, this rule may seem obvious. Some of that may be hindsight bias, but in general it is. What’s not obvious is the proper way to put this rule in place. Well, there are 3 mistakes that people tend to make that get in the way, and that’s what I’m going to warn you about today.
The first mistake people tend to make is making everything about themselves. Everyone likes to talk about themselves, so when you take this away from people, it makes them feel bad. For example, people often about rough times or their achievements. You may follow up by talking about something worse you went through. Or, you could reply with something better you’ve achieved. That’s fine, just know that person probably likes you a little less. The fix for this varies from situation to situation. In general, you can overcome this by talking about other people before switching the topic to yourself.
The second mistake people tend to make is bad body language. You may often find yourself well invested in a conversation. But, your body language could be telling the other person that you’re not interested. A common example of this is RBF or Resting B*tch Face. This is when you have glazed eyes and a subtle frown when your face is resting. You can overcome this by opening your eyes a little bit and having a slight smile in conversation. People sometimes uninterested body language. It makes the speaker wonder if they should continue talking or if the listener is even paying attention. Start improving your body language by leaning forward with open body language.
The last mistake on the list is being too negative. Do you tend to complain when something is wrong? You might want to stop that. You see, when you are being negative, others around you pick up on that energy. That means that you are making them feel bad. In general, the longer that people feel bad around you, the more they associate you with negative feelings. That means that they like you less. There is a time and place for negative stories, but, when you meet someone, you have to be careful in telling them. That is because those types of stories makes them feel negative emotion.
If you don’t make any of these 3 mistakes, then people will end up liking you a lot more often. When people like you, a lot of opportunities open up for you. Life will be better, and this is a great improvement to make. Keeping this in mind, you should remember that there’s no way to force everyone to like you. There will always be people that dislike you regardless of what you do, so don’t waste your time trying.